i think this is best done in list format. i love lists. i haven't written a list in a long time. let the list begin!
1) i woke up to my alarm clock (i.e. my cell phone), which i had set to 10:30 a.m. so as to avoid the debacle of last sunday, on which i slept until 5 in the evening due to a combination of sleep deprivation, depression (i'm S.A.D.), and an epic and embarrassingly obvious symbolic dream from which i could not wake. i rose at 11, and suddenly i was filled with the urge to listen to that song "time warp" from rocky horror picture show. so...
2) ...i went into the kitchen, put that shit on LOUD, and proceeded to make my epic sunday breakfast (eggs-in-the-hole, fool!). some songs are really good in the morning. "time warp" is one of them. you know, rocky horror is one of those movies you watch when you're thirteen, and when you're thirteen you think it's awesome but then time goes on and you're like, "this shit sucks and is totally stupid and monster mash." but then you get a little older and then you don't really care anymore. that movie and the soundtrack are really fun. i would never go to a midnight showing. all i'm saying is that you should give it another chance and accept it for the goofy semi-stupid yet amazing movie that it is. tim curry, people. you know you want to do him, no matter which way you swing.
3) i looked at the internet and drank way too much coffee and got into the shower. i blasted echo and the bunnymen in the shower. then i went into the living room and watched porn for a while. THEN as i was reheating some potluck leftovers, i heard a door open in our apartment. i froze. who the FUCK was there? "hello...?" i called. that's it, i thought, my worst fears are coming true. somebody is burglarizing my apartment and i am about to be violated. BUT! just as i was about to drop my reheated sloppy joe and run like a bastard into the streets wearing nothing but my mom's old silk kimono (in twenty-one degree weather!), who walks into the kitchen but ANDREA! "you scared the shit out of me!" i said. i started laughing and then i started crying and i couldn't stop shaking. as it turns out, AJ had taken a personal day and i had no idea she was home. "i was watching porn and listening to loud music!" i cried. she didn't care. i live with an awesome person. she is much more preferable to a burglar.
4) i continued my herzog/kinski marathon and watched my best fiend. kinski is fascinating, seductive, an utter maniac, a complete lunatic. herzog is, i feel, a bit of a lunatic himself, but he is a sneaky lunatic, a very composed maniac. sometimes i question the claims that they, at various points in their working relationship, truly wanted to murder each other, but then i think of the gigantic, almost uncontainable nature of fitzcarraldo and aguirre: the wrath of god, and how they almost seem like products of strangulation. their relationship is tragic in its turbulence. it is simultaneously frightening and enviable. kinski died in 1991. i'm sad he isn't alive anymore. he and herzog made five films together. i suppose i am sad whenever any epic saga ends. lump-in-the-throat and all that shit.
4) after watching my best fiend, i felt the urge to utilize the B-level vodka somebody had left in our fridge after the potluck. i put on like, A THOUSAND layers and went to family dollar. god bless family dollar. it is a fucking oasis in this wasteland that is the ass-end of bushwick. however, family dollar was out of orange juice. there was orangeADE and TAMPICO and SUNNY D, but i was not about to fuck with that shit. so i went to the bodega on knickerbocker and THEY were out of huge jugs of OJ too! so i had to buy a bunch of small bottles of OJ to satisfy our need for screwdrivers in the evening. i also bought more coffee. WOW!
5) i arrived home and fixed myself a drink and had some smokes and worked on my writing. andrea came out of her room and we scrolled through the best and worst dressed ladies on the golden globes red carpet. we didn't know who half of them were. a few years ago i would have known every single one of them. today it felt good to not know and just be like, "ew, what the hell is she wearing." i am going to hell! oh well. i pressed on with my second draft and now i am here, writing on this thing and exhausted. these days are so long and sad. i love winter, but it is a masochistic kind of love. i wish that i was not so fascinated by misery, by things becoming darker earlier and lighter later. it is safe here in the house. it is safe if you hide underneath thermals and sweaters and leggings and socks and blankets and comforters. i suppose i'll have to leave the house tomorrow if i am to complete the many things on my to-do list, but it feels good to have sequestered myself inside for the day. in winter, you must hide yourself away as much as possible. you must do as bears do and hibernate as best you can until things are not so cold.